This is the 21st Century – Why are we still talking about women’s safety in public spaces? Hmm….. Did you know Shweta? Let’s introduce her – Shweta was a confident girl, but she lost every bit of her confidence when she was coming back from office at midnight in a cab and the driver slowed down, while two bikers came close to their car. She was in a city far away from her home, and had no one to call at this hour. When Shweta tried to approach the cab service support system, she got a text that someone will contact her within 24-48 hours. Was this timeline going to be helpful in any way? Shweta summoned all her strength and confronted the driver for what he was probably doing. She warned him that her brother was on Police Patrol and approaching them soon (She had no relatives in the same city, or in Police). Her presence of mind brought the cab driver back on track who eventually apologised and she safely reached her place. While names are different, the experience shared is totally genuine.
Why is Women’s Safety in Public Spaces a Concern?
What we read just now, is not about Shweta. It is about most of us girls/women who have faced some unwelcome behaviors from strangers which made our fears come true. Here are some real life stories of once upon a time, which timelessly stayed with the women who experienced it all, and choose to be fearless.
The Unwelcome Stares
Picture this – You step out of your house to visit a friend’s place which is almost a mile away. You cross tens of streets, and every second person stares at you, as if scanning you from head to toe. You are so conscious by now that you have doubts on your clothing, if you forgot to wear something, or if you are exposing some part of the body. Coming back to your destination, you realize that nothing was wrong with your outfit. You were being stared at for the mere fact that you are a girl. This is something almost every girl can relate to, more so in rural areas as compared to big cities.
Girls, whenever you face such stares, look back with more intensity. Do not shy away from staring at them. Question them with your eyes, show them with confidence that their stares are not sanctioned.
Over-Crowded Public Spaces
Once upon a time, Rashmi was in an over-crowded bus, so much so that every person was touching 5 different people on every speed breaker or slight turn. This not so gentleman standing right behind Rashmi found the perfect opportunity to touch her buttocks. What Rashmi did next left the guy in pain and a lesson to keep his hands to himself. Rashmi took advantage of yet another speed breaker and hit her elbow on his stomach, while also standing with her heels right on his shoes.
People often assume that being surrounded with more people gives them the chance to feel anything and anyone, while pretending unbeknownst. If you are a victim like Rashmi, make them realize that they did not turn invisible.
Also read about laws for women
Deserted Streets Have Ghosts
More than crowded places, deserted spaces are a fear for women’s safety in public spaces. Preeti, a 13 something teenager, was on her way back home after she left her friend’s house. She was alone, and there came a thin street. Preeti had just stepped in when she noticed two guys coming from the opposite side. Who in her wildest dreams would have wondered that the guys who came from nowhere, seemingly headed towards work or something, would grope her breasts and not leave until she forcefully got out of his grip to run. At least Preeti did not! Words remained frozen in her mouth until she reached her home, went to the washroom and cried her heart out. This was not the first time this had happened before, all in bright daylight. What was she wearing? A full sleeved top which did not reveal anything that could catch anyone’s eyes for what she faced. At a very tender age, Preeti understood that clothes could never be responsible for sexual offences.
Prepare yourself in advance if you ever become a victim of deserted streets like Preeti, because you never know when those karate training sessions may come handy. Give them a taste of their not so classy acts in way classy manner.
Unwanted Touch
You are in a mall, someone crosses the path and their hands brush off with yours. It could be a coincidence, but you can sense the innocence if it is a stranger and cares to apologize. Girls are more acquainted with the unwanted touch because they face it often and are more sensitive to it. In fact, a male friend shared his uncomfortable experience too when a transgender kept touching his face in a public transport asking for money. Nobody wants to be touched inappropriately by strangers, neither men nor women.
So if you know that you are being touched by some stranger in a public place and this person is unapologetically persistent, call them out, ask them if they really need something since they are nudging you so persistently. Trust me, when you do this, they will most likely have that sorry look on their face. Why? Because such troublemakers do not expect anyone to speak out against them.
Nirbhaya Case Effect
There was a time when Kritika found herself all alone in her College Bus along with the Bus Driver and another staff guy, since it was the evening shift of the exam and others had left early. The distance from College to home was almost an hour, but she had imagined hundreds of scenarios by then – her escape route, how she would punch the attacker in the face, how she would manage to drive the bus after somehow throwing the two guys out of the bus, how she would hit them hard in the face with the mighty pen she used to write the exam. All this while, her parents, friends, College Authorities, everyone was on an alert mode, while Kritika silently chanted Hanuman Chalisa. It was the month of December and every person caring for her was sweating because it had not been long since Nirbhaya news gave everyone goosebumps. Kritika reached home safely that day, but the memories of that day still raise her heart beat, even after years.
Note: Those who don’t realize, every experience shared here is in itself an offence, or may lead the perpetrators to commit an offence. Hence, it is important to understand the seriousness of women’s safety in public spaces and make it safer for everyone!
Be Fearless
It is easy to say and hard to practice, especially when you are in danger. But speaking biologically, even your body gives that adrenaline rush with a boost of energy to fight or take that flight. So what stops you? When in danger, always keep your senses active. Find ways to escape the danger. Do not think twice before speaking out when you feel comfortable. And most importantly, when you know you will be at the dead end soon, contact the Police however possible. Search for that mobile phone, take help from passers by, beat the attacker with your hands, feet, or bite them harder. Whatever it takes, be safe and be fearless.
